This week I interviewed my sister, Sam, who calls me out on not listening and calling her the wrong name. Podcaster of the year! Sam spent two years trying to get pregnant with no avail when she was 30-32 years old. When her husband graduated from his Masters program and the stress melted away, they left on a trip to Germany. She recalls knowing she was pregnant when she got a low grade fever and was so sick she couldn't explore the countryside. She had an amazing pregnancy but her due date came and went. She tells all about her natural induction techniques including drinking seahorse tea. She wants everyone to know about laboring on a birthing chair. The best chair I have found on google resides HERE. Sam was committed to a natural childbirth even though an induction was indicated when she reached two weeks past due. Sam says, "My doula was my defensive lineman when they kept coming in to offer me an epidural." Sam's favorite baby product: All the things at Target. Her best mom advice is to leave the house at 8 am and go shopping at Target with a Starbucks in it.
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LOOKING FOR A DOULA IN CHARLOTTE, NC? HIRE MyDoulaHeidi
[00:00:00] Okay, and that format? Yeah, I can edit it. Perfect. It's just a DOT wave is a little bit of a higher sound quality. And that was its. I have the instructions from the University and how to do it. But I don't I could just spend the next 20 minutes trying to figure that out. So I'm gonna do it. So if you had enough Starbucks, are we.
[00:00:20] We can always do this and like have a Starbucks break, you know, right? There's there's a spot that would be is my Target and Starbucks. I drink Starbucks all the time during my pregnancy. That's when I got addicted 13 years ago that I can promote caffeine that pregnancy as a lullaby. Okay. So look specifically talks about how your baby can't process.
[00:00:48] How about no something else? So essentially I have like a I'll have a set intro asset outro like a sponsorship part that we'll all get edited in. So there's [00:01:00] not like we're not about to go like hello. Welcome to the birth story, you know podcaster anything like that, but I am right now going to try to figure out how to transition to get this thing started and then once we get started give a little intro for me.
[00:01:16] No, it'll it's like pre-recorded that gets dropped in. It's similar to like what you listen to you for that but usually you're like today I have with me the oh, yeah, so I'm gonna I'm gonna start that. So tell me when you're ready. And if I have to do it a couple times, I think that'd be kind of fun.
[00:01:36] I don't even know what today is. So oh, so let's just start and and get going. So I want to get comfortable though to talk to you and get the. Are you comfortable? Okay, sorry are you know scratches out? Yeah, okay, because if you're in the middle of a sentence and you do that, I can't edit it out.
[00:01:55] So just make sure you stop talking if you have to do something weird and then we'll talk about how [00:02:00] weird it is and then I'll cut all that stuff out. Okay now I'll just keep going so. All right. Good morning. Everybody. I've got Samantha with me today. She's actually my sister. So for everyone listening out there, I want Samantha to tell us a little bit about herself, even though I know everything about her.
[00:02:21] So I'm Heidi Campbell host of the birth story. Welcome Samantha. Do you know what day it is today though? First? It's the day after Christmas. Okay. Yeah. So first of all, I know we've been sisters and like 46, you know, and I we've been sisters for a long time, but I don't go by Samantha. I'll just let you know that now if I'm sorry everyone bye Sam, so Sam's s.
[00:02:48] Alright. Sorry listeners isn't my sister. Thank you. Wait, let's tell the listeners why I say I call you Samantha most of the time because I named my dog Sam [00:03:00] after your ex-boyfriend. So yeah, so yeah, so I guess I should think that's nice because you don't want me to be like your dog or something.
[00:03:12] I don't know but I go by Sam Sam is my name. Okay. Hey Sam, okay. Okay, so we're here to talk about your birth stories. So tell us a little bit about your family how old your kids are. Okay, I'm all that. Okay, so I have a wonderful husband and three kids and the oldest kid is 24 now and then I have a 13 year old and a 12 year old and the 13 and 12 year old.
[00:03:43] Were children I gave birth to so those are my birth my tuber stories. Yeah. Okay. So, how did you get Phoebe? Oh my gosh. That's a good part of the story. Yeah. So my oldest I started dating [00:04:00] my husband when she was three. So she's 24. Like I said, so it's been 21 years. So I lay claim to her also, so she is my daughter also, even though I didn't.
[00:04:12] Birth to her so we'll say hi Phoebe. Hey pheebs. So let's talk about these really like leave me out of this will leave you out of it. So let's talk about your pregnancy and getting pregnant because I want listeners to hear your story leading up to getting pregnant with Alessandro. Okay. So Alessandro is my 13 year old and my husband and I had been trying for like two years.
[00:04:42] To get pregnant and we really wanted a baby. We had dated and lived together for like five years before we ever moved before we got married you sinner. Well, yeah kind of but you know, we both come from broken homes. So we just want to make sure everything was like [00:05:00] copacetic and what's going to work and so once we got married then we started trying for a baby and it took two years before.
[00:05:12] Actually got pregnant with Alessandro now, he didn't like do the whole. Let's look at Future fertility and you know measure all these different things and we weren't like crazy about it. We just had sex when we wanted to have sex and we're hoping for the best but I was a really concerned it was like worrying to me because I was like, I feel like my entire life.
[00:05:32] That my body was like made to give birth to babies and like why was I not getting pregnant? Which I know I've had a lot of friends who have had similar circumstances to so we're real quick. How old were you so good question if I'm 46 now and he's 13. I was what is that? So this 33 so when you get 30 or 32 32 when you were having yep.
[00:06:00] [00:06:00] Either you or your husband you are on a fertility Journey though. Yeah for two years in your early 30s. Yes, and then we went on a trip to Germany. So we went on this really fun fabulous trip to Germany and we had an amazing time and we were relaxed and we were drinking a little bit all kinds of things probably that you shouldn't be doing for getting pregnant, but we have this great time and we were in the baths and Baden-Baden.
[00:06:30] And we believe that he was conceived in the town of Baden-Baden where the baths are in Germany because we were having a really good time there. So when we got back from the trip. I was pregnant so I don't know if it was just a measure of being relaxed and he was relaxed and all the stars were aligned but two years and to our journey then I was pregnant with Alessandro and we were super happy about it.
[00:06:59] We [00:07:00] by the way almost named him Baden. I'm really glad that you didn't do that. Which means bath. Oh my goodness. Okay. Well loses. His name is Alessandro Chagall. After a couple of different painters, correct? Well Alessandro just so we could have a Hispanic name because my husband's Hispanic and then Chagall is for a Russian Jewish painter that we live awesome.
[00:07:23] Yeah. I love the name. So one of the things that you've shared with me, is that you. Like when you learned your pregnant that you felt different, so tell me about what it was like what happened to you with both of your pregnancies that kind of let you know that you are pregnant. So I had never heard of this before from anybody, but when I was so when we were in Germany.
[00:07:47] We then went over to Belgium and when we went to Belgium we were start we were staying this really cute place with little Courtyard and cobblestone streets and it was just like so romantic and fabulous [00:08:00] and you know, it was time to go out and about in the town of Belgium and dusar and the town of Belgium, but Belgium's of I swear she has a master's degree.
[00:08:14] We're about to go out and about. And I actually remember what town we were in and I just I got a fever I felt sick and I said I can't go out. So I've actually never seen Belgium besides her hotel. Because I just felt bad I got in the bathtub. I got a fever I felt sick and lo and behold when I got home I was pregnant.
[00:08:34] So I just thought oh, maybe that sickness coincided at the same time with you know conception but then when I had my second child Paden the same exact thing happened like I got a fever I didn't feel well I had to stay in bed. I just didn't feel quite right like that's. That's the best way I can explain it.
[00:08:56] And again, that was my signal with her that I was pregnant [00:09:00] because I was like, oh, maybe this is the same thing that happened with Alessandro. So, how did your pregnancy? Go over all it was awesome. Like it was amazing. I loved being pregnant. I loved Alessandra being in my belly. I love seeing my belly grow.
[00:09:16] I love feeling the little kicks of him. I I wasn't really somebody who got sick. The only thing I was in the beginning part of my pregnancy mostly was like a little nauseous where I just kind of had to have snacks everywhere. So I had like, you know, the little center console in your car. I had like nuts and you know just things that wouldn't spoil if I kept them in my car crackers that kind of thing because literally I'd be somewhere and I'd be like if you don't give me something to stick in my mouth right now it is not going to be good.
[00:09:47] So that was a weird feeling to me with pregnancy of you feel nauseous, but you feel. Need to eat something because every prior experience in my life besides being pregnant a feeling nauseous. Of course, you don't want to eat anything [00:10:00] but this nausea for pregnancy. I had to stick something in my mouth.
[00:10:04] Okay, so you never had to take any medicine no, no, no. Now so the pregnancy was great. I walked all the time. That was a big thing with me is going walking in the woods and there's this great place called Bent Creek, but I still go walking and I love it. And so I walked all through my pregnancy.
[00:10:22] Yeah, cool. So what happened is you got close to the end. Like did you have a due date? Did you know I mean, you said that you knew when you were when maybe you got pregnant? So like did you think that your due date was accurate? I'm one of those people who doesn't really believe in due dates. I kind of just think oh your baby's coming around that period of time but it was February.
[00:10:46] So Alessandra was to be due at the beginning couple weeks of February and he ended up being born on, February 23rd. So we were really hoping he would come on February 22nd because that's my grandfather's birthday [00:11:00] and my daddy Sam so I thought that would be really really cool thing to happen, but he didn't came on the 23rd.
[00:11:07] But what else were you off? So on that light you were overdue so your due date was sometime in early February. Yeah. And so what was that like when kind of the due date came in when so. Going to my physician who she's wonderful amazing person. She kept saying, you know, well, you're going over the due date and usually we induce if you go over the due date and I was like, oh, come on get this baby just a little bit more time.
[00:11:37] So she gave the baby like another week and then nothing happened and I'll tell you a couple things I did too and then and then two weeks and she basically said two weeks is my limit like you need to be in do so after two weeks past it. Due date is when I had an appointment at 8:00 a.m. At the hospital to be induced with pitocin to start some of the contractions that patoot [00:12:00] pitocin just gets the contractions started.
[00:12:02] So I was really disappointed about that and I tried everything I could for the two weeks prior to get Alessandro to come out but he was he was a very happy inside my belly and I think he wanted to stay there for a very long time and he didn't want to come out right then. So what are some of the things that you did to try so.
[00:12:20] My massage therapist Isabel was amazing. So I would I had massages all throughout pregnancy and she gave amazing prenatal massages. And so she said okay. This isn't going to feel like all those really nice other massages you had and it was like pressure points on my ankles were she dug in and just like kind of hurt you on your ankles and and those trigger points are pressure points or supposed to help with getting contractions started.
[00:12:49] Unfortunately, they did not for me and I think I did that a couple times with her. And then I decided to go to acupuncture. So one of my best friends her husband is a Chinese [00:13:00] medicine doctor and he's like, yeah, you should come for acupuncture. We do it all the time to induce labor. And apparently there's a lot of evidence that goes along with that.
[00:13:07] So I went in for that session and I believe the majority of the needles they put were on my sacral area and my back and you definitely could feel the like the sort of electric charge, you know down there and I could feel the baby moving. And a little bit more Alessandra was moving around. But again did not induce labor and at that same Chinese medicine doctor office the acupuncture.
[00:13:33] They're like, okay. Try this T. Are you willing to do anything and I'm like, yes, and it was this T the contained I'm not shitting you like a dried sea horse and it and they're like, please please and drink this whole thing and. I'm like drink this seahorse also. So yes Alessandra, if you're listening to this, yes, mommy ate a seahorse for you and some gross nasty [00:14:00] tea that they described as driveway water runoff.
[00:14:05] Like that's what it tasted like was disgusting like you just went into a gutter and picked up some water. That's what this T. Tasted like again did not induce labor. So massage acupressure points. Acupuncture gross T. And the last thing I did which was completely disgusting and probably felt the most little kicks and contractions from it, but nothing like again ever happened was.
[00:14:30] I think it's called castor oil right that sound right? Okay, so I was just like chug and castor oil like it was Jagermeister in college, you know, like I'm just like jogging it chugging it trying to get those contractions to come and yeah, they did not come. So at that point I'm gonna interrupt right there.
[00:14:49] It has a birth Doula. Yes for anyone who's listening and wants to try castor oil don't chug it like you were in college. One to two [00:15:00] tablespoons of castor oil mixed up in like a smoothie or a milkshake and I only recommend doing castor oil one time when you do castor oil multiple times you end up with diarrhea.
[00:15:13] I wish I had a hat. That's my duel for the first baby because I didn't know that. Yeah, I was like I had the bottle up to my mouth like drinking castor oil. And Frank's like are you is are you sure you should do this? And so I was willing I was willing. So I have a question for you to because one of the things that I want listeners to hear that's really important for natural induction is having sex because there are so many prostaglandins in the sea men.
[00:15:41] Oh, yeah that and in having an orgasm or it like releases so much oxytocin that that's one of a really good. Did you or you comfortable enough to have sex we had sex all the time? Yes. Yes. Yes sex all the time. We had sex all the time that did not work either and kept walking. [00:16:00] What do you mean like walking through Bent Creek?
[00:16:03] Oh, yeah kept walking and having sex all the time did not work and my my husband is a Jedi master with orgasms. So that's that's really didn't work. So I hope everyone saw on the podcast at this is an explicit podcast. Yeah. Sorry, we are sisters and I do have a potty mouth sometimes. So no none of that work, but I tried everything.
[00:16:29] But again, I tried not to stress too much out about it. I just didn't I think I was stressing out at the end there with all these things because I desperately did not want to be induced. I did not want to have pitocin at not want to have to have anything. Injected in my body or the baby's body that could potentially be harmful in my mind at least, you know, like I'm like, I just so desperately wanted to have this natural childbirth, right?
[00:16:54] And to me I was like, oh if I get pitocin then it's not a natural childbirth, [00:17:00] but it ended up being fine. It ended up being. Okay. Okay, so let's talk about that for a minute because there's going to be so many people that are listening that go over there due date. They know that they have a deadline that induction is.
[00:17:13] Possibility and so many people think the same thing that you think and so and this is just a side note here. Like I was induced with both of my children as a birth Doula and in my sister was also and I had a really good experiences with. An induction, so I want to maybe talk about like where that fear of pitocin comes from.
[00:17:36] I've heard a lot of myths out there. And so kind of do you remember what your perception like why you were afraid? Well go ahead of my thing is is I don't want any foreign substance in my body or the baby's body. I mean, I barely even take Advil or Tylenol as a regular person not even being pregnant.
[00:17:51] So why would I want something in my veins shooting through me and why would I want contractions that? Or not [00:18:00] natural conduct tractions in my own head. Like I'd rather just have the contractions of my body are going to give me and I'll explain a little bit of that. That one is second because that was different and then just the environment and setting of the hospital.
[00:18:14] I wanted to labor because I knew labor was going to be a long process. I'd rather labor more at home or in the woods then necessarily like. Sitting in a hospital bed hooked up to an IV. And if I'm not supposed to eat soft cheese with the baby inside my belly. I mean, it seems a little strange and be pumping something into me through my veins.
[00:18:36] That would be going to my baby. I mean, that's what I was thinking. So that's sort of where it came from. But to me the biggest thing with the pitocin is got to the hospital like 8 a.m. And they stuck the you know needle in my arm got it going with an IV bag and it took a while like I was just like chatting in bed.
[00:18:58] I was like, when is this gonna happen [00:19:00] one of these going to come back up for a second? What time did you check into the hospital for the end? So is 8 a.m. It is tucked in. Yeah, if you were listening kind of I miss the time, of course like this is the story of my life. I miss the times it was eight o'clock.
[00:19:16] That would be 8 a.m. Okay, so that's a really good because the city that I'm in a lot of the providers like to start inductions at night and they bring the moms in at like 6 o'clock at night and that's horrible. I know I feel like it's really counterintuitive because I feel like you need a good night's sleep and you need to be.
[00:19:34] Ed so I did another point will bring in it local OB-GYN and ask them why they start inductions and sink 6 p.m. At night now I didn't end up having him until like 2 o'clock in the morning or something so I can see. How it might help them out to like start it at night and then maybe they're having a baby by the morning when they're coming on shift again, and they've had a good night sleep, but I think it was a [00:20:00] really smart and good to start at 8:00 and do what we didn't go and then one of the things we missed here, is that you did you hired a birth tool.
[00:20:07] This is a show up Isabel. She really loves you. She I forgot about yeah, so Isabel was an integral part of this so is about friend massage therapist that I've had for years and and she had never really done the Doula thing before. I don't think I don't think she had really done it before and she is just this amazing healing.
[00:20:33] Human being she just knows so much about human anatomy and how to help you when you're in pain or need to relax with massages and all these things and she had studied all of this cool fertility sort of medicine. And what country you remember what believe believe she worked with my God. Shaman woman and Belize to learn fertility massage.
[00:20:59] Yes, it was [00:21:00] really cool. So anyway, I just proposed her I said how about being our Doula and I started off for some of my readings I had and then she read up on her own about a lot of different things and Frank was going to be at the hospital the whole time but I knew he needed a support person to like so the three of us kind of were a team at the hospital and she knew it was an induction and she brought like a whole.
[00:21:24] Full of stuff and we had a thing of snacks and all kinds of things but she was there with us through the entire process and like I said 8:00 a.m. And I didn't have him until after 2:00 a.m. I mean, they needed to have a break and like have a burger and have a snack themselves and switch in and out of the room like helping me sometimes and that sort of thing so she was an amazing do love that was my first experience with a doula.
[00:21:50] I would never suggest to anybody. To not have a doula like everybody should have a doula that's giving birth regardless as part of your team. It's [00:22:00] not like you're only person I think a lot of people have misconceptions about what a duel is but support person during birth. So she helped massage me.
[00:22:07] She talked to me. She helped keep me calm. She got Mom out of the room when Mom was driving me crazy. So that kind of thing spitting your mom out of the room. Sometimes is really important right now our mom answered her. Cell phone while I was pushing my first child out. So thank you is about yeah, so doulas can help with that.
[00:22:31] Yeah, I think. Yeah, everybody was coming to my room like plugging their cell phones in and stuff and bringing their chaos into my room and it smells like yeah, I think she's such a delicate gentle person like she's like, yeah, I think this would be really nice if y'all can push this out into the hallway somewhere, you know, so she could do it because you don't have the strength at that point to kind of be your own advocate.
[00:22:55] So the Doula helps you do that. Yeah. I know and I'm going to interject right here for [00:23:00] any of our very Savvy listeners that are like. Heidi is a doula. So I was very young 13 years ago. And I Isabel actually inspired me to become a doula after this not me. It wasn't me. No you had something to do with I think you gave me a book like the Doula book or something, but I probably like being competitive.
[00:23:23] Like I was pissed that I didn't get to be your Doula. Oh, I was like, well, I'm definitely gonna become one of these magical rain eula's so that I could be your do Lon. Our next birth and so I was so I was Sam's delivers her Paden. She was an amazing do love for Paden. So but Isabelle, I just remember kind of being in the waiting room and thinking whatever this mystical creature is doing in there.
[00:23:46] Like I want to be her, you know, yeah, I want to be healing you know, my sister. Yeah. I feel like now you correct me if I'm wrong and I know this isn't me interviewing you but I can't remember the answer this. Weren't you [00:24:00] doing something around that time where you were helping people in hospice or you're helping people with die somehow and then you were like.
[00:24:07] This connects in the other direction. I don't know. I just have this like memory of that in my head under person know I don't even hundred person because you're like I want to be on the other side of it on the birth side. No, I mean I was like a drug rep that was like helping people with their medicine so maybe but no no I did have a few friends that were giving birth that I.
[00:24:33] Like kind of helped through there before I became a doula I like that I had helped and so I thought I knew what I was doing, but I kind of doubt Doula training but okay, I did not know what I was doing that so back to your birth. Okay, so you check in at eight o'clock in the morning Isabel's got the room set up like your husband's there.
[00:24:53] They get the IV started with the pitocin and then kind of what happens. Oh [00:25:00] I had let me set the scene for you. I put pictures of my grandmother and my grandfather on the windowsill summoning their healing Spirits because they had passed and just there to help help me through the labor process. You know, we had some good sense going on in the room Isabel brought me some.
[00:25:22] Ice pops, you know to have during labor and then the contractions started eventually it took a few hours. It didn't it wasn't like a media took a few hours for the pitocin to kick in and they step in started messing with it turning it up and down and everything. And after I've now had the two births I can compare the differences between the natural contractions and pitocin and I think the really hard part about pitocin.
[00:25:49] Is because they're having to adjust it to your body. There there A lot of times right on top of one another so you'll have a contraction and [00:26:00] then just one deep breath and then another one starts whereas with natural contractions. You'll have a contraction. You know, you have the squeezing of the muscles and then you have like 60 seconds.
[00:26:12] Usually 30 seconds at least to like breathe to calm down a little bit and then go into the next one. So it gives you a little bit more space in between contractions. And again, maybe if they had just done the Pitocin a little bit differently and maybe there would have been more space but that was a hard part for me, but I forgot to say it also toured the hospital ahead of time.
[00:26:34] And had seen that they had birth chairs now. I think they had shoved in some closet far away where they didn't really want to get him out for people. They thought it was a little weird. I got the feeling but I knew they were there because I had done the birth tour and I had asked those questions.
[00:26:51] So when we first got there I asked if they would get the Birch are out of the closet and one lady one of the nurses looked at the other and the [00:27:00] birth chair and then it so that process of finding the birch. Probably took an hour or two. Just FYI. Yeah, so no to self when you're touring the hospital and you see really cool things like a birthing ball or a peanut ball or a birth chair like make sure you have in your birth plan or your Doula or your partner something knows.
[00:27:20] You know what you want that environment or that room to look like you don't have to worry about any of those things. If you hire a doula, right, they'll do it all for you. So yeah, you know what and that is a good point because Isabel was tracking all that down for me, so I didn't have to really mess with that and I wasn't really.
[00:27:36] Having any contractions. I didn't need her yet, you know and she was out in the hallway finding the Birch are for isn't everything organized, you know, so for everyone that's listening that is like, what is a birth? Oh, yeah. Okay. So there's gonna be a lot of people that have no idea. So talk about like what a birth chairs.
[00:27:53] Well, I you may be able to talk about it better than I can but I can describe it from my point of view. Is [00:28:00] it kind of looked like. An old person's Walker is what it looked like to me and like with the little chair part. It had a very thin Rim that you could sit kind of sit down in your Walker kind of thing.
[00:28:16] So I'm holding onto metal bars on the side, but I'm sitting and it's kind of like a squats it. It's like a low set because I had read that that reduces your birth canal. Makes it easier for the baby to come out and I wanted everything that would make it easier. And so it had like a small room. I would say it wasn't the most comfortable birth chair in the world.
[00:28:40] The one that they had but at that point it was great because it was support I did not want to be in the bed. I did not want to be confined and my husband was able to get in a chair behind me and kind of enveloped me with like his arms and support my back and rub my back and that sort of thing like while I was laboring, okay.
[00:28:58] So would you describe it any [00:29:00] differently or yeah, I would describe it as like a toilet seat. That's not on a toilet. Yeah, the guy still has like a hole in it. So it kind of gravity. Let's maybe my butt just felt so big that it felt like it was like a one millimeter Rim. All right, but it just kind of fell.
[00:29:18] You know with gravity so everybody who's listening so squat squat squat squat squat, like we can't say it enough right like sit in your chair sit on your ball, but squat squat squat because it actually really does help to get the baby to move down to get in a good position to put pressure on that cervix to open the cervix to work with gravity when you are laying flat on a bed on your back labor just takes longer.
[00:29:46] So yeah, and I would say the best way that I could explain. This is if you're laying down if you've got a shit if you got to poop, okay. Okay 6 Plus am I allowed to say that? Yeah, you can say shit. [00:30:00] Okay. So if you've got a shit and somebody said, oh you have to shit. Why don't you lay down in the bed to shit?
[00:30:07] Why don't you do that get us imagine laying in your bed on your back? And then trying to shit, of course that makes no sense. Not that a baby is a shit, but it feels like that sometimes so like it's much better to be like sitting squatting whatever because then you're in a position that just like you said gravity.
[00:30:27] It makes more sense and it feels better. Yeah, so it's sort of to me archaic to like lay in a bed because that's not. Is the easiest position so at this point in your labor, you're still all natural in the sense that the only medical intervention is a pitocin drip. Yes, right. And did you have an IV bag of fluids?
[00:30:46] Yeah to so an IV bag of fluids and a pitocin drip and you your husband is massaging you and you're sitting in the birds chair Isabel I think is massaging all over your whole body. Yes you talk to me about [00:31:00] how your mind what you're doing with your mind when the contractions. Well, I was doing all these visualizations and I had forgot this part 2 it's been so long Hypno birthing.
[00:31:12] I had gone to some Hypno birthing classes with a hypnotherapist and there was like a trigger word that Frank and I came up with and then he touched my shoulder at a certain point when he would see that I was struggling and it was basically just a relaxation. Mood to get into and so that would help me then relax even further.
[00:31:33] But in my mind I just pictured I just kind of had mantras in my head. Like I'm so excited to see Alessandro. I think I had one that was like my my flower of my birth canal canal is opening like a beautiful flower. So I kept just imagining like my vagina opening bigger and bigger to let the baby out and.
[00:31:56] I also just was breathing. I wasn't trying to struggle [00:32:00] against the contractions because I'm telling you having a baby for the first time as a weird experience and I was not prepared. I had read a million books. I am like a researcher. I had read everything I could every first person that count every medical thing.
[00:32:15] I read it all but it's still you still. Don't know what it's like until you actually go through it. And to me it was like birth is like peristalsis, you know, like with a snake and the snake is like doing those like contraction e things till I get the food down, you know, so that's to me. It's like peristalsis like the constructions to get your baby out and if you like.
[00:32:40] Are trying to like push really hard and it doesn't work. You just have to give into it give over to it. Just like you do an orgasm by the way is just let go it's like when you let go and you breathe and you give in to the experience of this baby trying to crawl out of your body, [00:33:00] which is a strange experience to think about right then it just goes more easily.
[00:33:05] And then I think I told you this whole thing to of. You know like the whole taking the shit on the bed like thing and being laying down that doesn't make any sense. Now, let's take taking a shit to the toilet. Okay, if you're on the toilet and you are trying to poop, okay, and you like and you're trying to poop it doesn't happen.
[00:33:24] You'll be there forever like but if you just.
[00:33:31] Breathe your poop out you breathe your poop out you just breathe in and you breathe out the people come out same thing with the baby. If you will just be calmer and actually given to the experience and like breathe in and out at least for me. I mean I'm saying there's like a worse for everybody but for me.
[00:33:48] That helped a lot. So you had a really long labor essentially. Yes. So if you start at eight o'clock in the morning, you didn't deliver until two o'clock in the morning the next day. Yeah, there were some [00:34:00] Altered States Of Consciousness going on, right? So you had mentioned that you didn't want to like put all these toxins or anything else in your body.
[00:34:06] So I'm assuming that you and your mind you were like, I'm definitely were you like I'm definitely not getting an epidural or were you open to getting an epidural? Well, I did not want to have an epidural but I was definitely open to whatever is going to keep this baby safe. I mean if they would have come in and said we need your right arm.
[00:34:27] We need to cut it off to make the baby safe. I'd be like go for it take my arm. So I was kind of of the attitude of whatever they think is going to keep the baby safe. Keep out Alessandro safe. I'm totally willing to do so you had a team. You totally trusted. Yeah, and but I didn't want and the Doula Isabel helped with this.
[00:34:46] I didn't want to be constantly offered because they kind of do this thing where they come to your room and offer you like epidurals and stuff or whatever and Isabel was kind of like my defensive line man, you know, who would go up to them and be like [00:35:00] don't bring that stuff up to her right now like she's doing you're doing.
[00:35:04] So what point do you think that things started to really intensify? Do you have a concept of the time frame? I don't have a concept of the timeframe, but they videoed everything for me. And that's another good reason to have some support people in the room. So Isabel and Frank video video to everything.
[00:35:20] So there's some crazy videos of me like what like my head like going around and I was making lots of. Deep ohm moaning sounds like I don't even know if I could just like to take a contracted. Do you think your listeners would like that? Yeah. Hopefully that does sound like a contraction. So those deep sounds were like really helping and I had done some prenatal yoga or where they said that you making those deep sounds actually helps to open up.
[00:35:54] Wha yeah. Wow. That's a guttural like opening sound that you'll [00:36:00] hear a lot from labouring women. Yeah, so and I so I knew that it was relaxing to me. It worked for me and I had my eyes closed a lot during labor and I was just in another world. I was in another place, but the touch of people really helped the massaging helped for me during pregnancy like pressure on my back moving around getting up and walking around the room all of those.
[00:36:26] Helped me. Okay. My least favorite thing would probably be the heart monitor that they put across your belly when you're in the middle of labor. At least for me that was a pain in the booty because it just it felt so heavy and like restrictive and like annoying did they constantly monitor you like that monitor was on and it never came out.
[00:36:50] Well, I mean not at 8 a.m. But when I was getting pretty heavy into the. Yeah, and to the contractions than it was on for hours an hour or [00:37:00] so. So while it can be annoying, I think it's really important to talk about the importance of that heart monitor though. So especially when you have like the artificial pitocin.
[00:37:11] Or any kind of medical intervention. They just want to make sure that the baby is doing okay. So they're looking for a seller ations decelerations, but that the babies, you know heart rate response to the contractions is doing okay. So did you find any comfort and that like knowing that he doing?
[00:37:29] Okay. No, not at all because it just scared me to death because it was like a big seat belt across my. Tummy like as a stretchy site Builder tightening every time there was a contraction there's a big device in the middle. And so all the time they're like, all right is decelerating. All right, it's decelerating and they're like freaking out about stuff which then freaks you out if nothing's going on really and in my head all I kept saying to myself was Alessandro is fine.
[00:37:54] Of course, the heart rates are going to decelerate when I'm like pushing or [00:38:00] you know, he's trying to get out of there. Yeah. Yeah. It's a tough job to get out of somebody. Yeah, well, I wasn't worried and thank goodness Isabel and Frank are really like the most calm people in the world. So I wasn't worried but I can see how for other people to like.
[00:38:21] It's just me out a little bit that they were so concerned with it and I just knew somehow in my head. Everything was fine. Yeah, but so I hear when people don't see the deceleration. You'll hear Mom's that will say that oh, I could I could look over and see that the baby was doing fine and that was comforting to me.
[00:38:39] But because does that happen where people give birth and like it doesn't decelerate at all. Yeah, if they have quicker Labor's to so that's a good note. We can step in right now and say that. When there is compression to the baby's head you will as a baby's coming through the birth canal will you will see heart decelerations if the [00:39:00] cord is wrapped at all.
[00:39:01] You'll see some decelerations. There are some many other reasons to have heart a celebrations or decelerations. But as long as they're short and they bounce back. The medical community seems to not you know, they watch it but they're not overly, you know concerned when you see a deceleration with a contraction when the baby's coming through the birth canal that's typically considered to be pretty normal thing to witness on a.
[00:39:27] And I heart rate strips. Oh, so you saw that with Alessandro? So as he was coming down here and the birth canal the head was getting compressed. There were some Heart decelerations by you were not scared by those. So those were that was good. Now, you just knew intuitively like your baby was doing fine.
[00:39:42] And so talk about the birth. So so the birth part. It was exciting. He has a nickname Turtle to this day because he was like, I don't know. I want to go back in out. No, I want to go back in with his little head. So I still call him Turtle. [00:40:00] But so the thing that was a little bit hard as my physician.
[00:40:04] I think I'd had a like a hard. Night that night of whatever was going on at the hospital and talk about it. I think it's important about her but you she had a tough night. Yes, so I was on the birth tear in originally, you know, I had a birth plan and everything and she was totally fine with me giving birth on the birth chair and she'd get down on the floor and like deliver the baby and we had talked all the way through but it's now like 2:30 in the morning.
[00:40:29] Whatever. And she comes in the room and it's getting close and she's just like Sam. I've had a really hard night here at the hospital. I just want everything to be safe for you and Alessandro, I need you to be on the bed. So I will tell you that my contractions. Really? I swear to God. They did not hurt Nothing Hurt about Labor.
[00:40:49] It was just weird like a babies crawling out of you weird until I laid down on the bed. And then when I laid down on the bed, my back was killing me my vagina like when he was [00:41:00] coming out I told or. That was horrible, you know whatever but I really do fault it with like laying down on the bed and instead of being able to give birth in the birth chair.
[00:41:09] But later on I found out that there was like a young child basically an 11 year old that night who had given birth and I think she was part of my physician was part of that whole process and so she had just had a you know, mentally and probably physically hard time and just wanted everything to be safe for me and Alessandra and it was she's an excellent physician so.
[00:41:31] So pushing them out it took a while to get them out. I kind of think of it as like carving the Grand Canyon your first baby out is like carving the Grand Canyon for the babies to come, you know, the future baby. So the first one man, it's a little harder for them a little harder for us on her to get out of there and head to turn and shoulder and everything and get out.
[00:41:51] But he eventually did no episiotomy. But you tore naturally. Yeah tour naturally and I wanted to because I had read up the. [00:42:00] Terry naturally and healing is actually better than having like a straight line kind of scalpel cut. I just read that so some research on that so tour naturally but I bled a bunch so Alessandra comes out.
[00:42:15] I'm so excited. He's so cute and and let's clarify Caillou didn't bleed from the tearing you were bleeding from a postpartum Hemorrhage. I have no clue. I have no clue but maybe is more common since I don't know your medical history. I'm gonna guess you had a postpartum Hemorrhage because. Let's let me just do a little T.
[00:42:35] Doula teaching right here is when so just even if you didn't know this is that your uterus is a muscle and when we labor naturally and you talked about we have those long breaks and between like so sometimes you'll be in labor and you'll have like a 20-minute break in between contractions, even when you're really, you know far along but that when we have pitocin and it's just conjecture and construction could Joshua and [00:43:00] conjunction and you had what a 16-hour labor?
[00:43:03] Something like that that muscle is tired. So then after the baby is expelled from the uterus that muscle it needs to continue to contract in order to deliver the placenta, but also so that you don't continue to bleed and Hemorrhage and sometimes that muscle is worn out. So tired so you so someday I'll interview a medical professional on the statistics here, but it is very common.
[00:43:31] I would say I hear stories about a lot of clients myself included where there was a postpartum Hemorrhage because of a really tired. Muscle the uterus after giving birth. So one of my nurses this is kind of a Funny Story. One of my nurses was like seven or eight months pregnant. I mean she was huge.
[00:43:50] She had a huge belly and she was so sweet. So right after I gave birth to Alessandro and they were like working on them. All the nurses are doing like the apgar [00:44:00] scores and see how healthy is and stuff. They were like we need to go to the restroom. Like we need to go to the bathroom or whatever. So I passed out.
[00:44:10] I passed out because I had lost so much blood and I said I'm about to pass out and she said just lean into me so I felt so bad. I'm like, I feel so bad and then I passed out right on her belly. Holding her she's just like hold on to me and I pass on her belly and she's holding on to me and then she's like can you take a couple more steps to the toilet?
[00:44:30] And it's a couple more steps and I passed out again and then my gosh the toilet I pass out again. So I think they and I kept his leaning into her big beautiful belly. It was kind of beautiful actually a nice felt bad though and they gave me some sort of medicine. I think to stop the bleeding of what was going on, but I forgot to tell you other part of the story is with the to.
[00:44:51] Weeks of being overdue and their minds right one of the things my doctor said is your placenta. Can [00:45:00] calcify and that can be bad because you're not getting nutrients to your baby and all that kind of thing. So as soon as the placenta came out after Alessandro, I was like show me that placenta cuz I was taking the placentas home anyway, and as I showed me that placenta and show me those calcifications show.
[00:45:15] So the doctor she held it up to me and showed me and there were these like little white spots. They look like white spots on there and she's like, it's not a ton but there are white spots on here showing calcification. Of the placenta, which is apparently not a good thing. So that's one of the reasons apparently that they induce.
[00:45:32] Yep. So and so I think some of the listeners that may be listening are. Like to go back to the beginning like being afraid of an induction or like not wanting to have an induction but here is Sam telling this amazing story that said the placenta is calcified. There was an urgency maybe to have had this induction and you still had a completely natural childbirth.
[00:45:55] Like you never got the epidural you never had any other medical interventions besides [00:46:00] that pitocin and IV drip even with a really long. You know labor. So tell us how much did Alessandro way? Okay, I really should have looked at this before I came for the interview, but I want to say he was like 6 pounds.
[00:46:14] 12 oz something like that. He was right in that little range. Yeah, so I mean and and you can sign both standards. I was like that it's a pretty tiny baby. So I think semi belly was enormous though. I was like are there other babies in there? Because I swear this baby is gonna be huge. We have short torsos in our family.
[00:46:32] So so yes, so you had a big belly but it's because you have a short torso. I was like darn it. I have gained 50 pounds, but this guy's almost 612. What am I gonna do? So you gained 50 pounds to so healthy normal. They sometimes they say 25 to 34 those people listening. I'm sure I'm to say it over and over again.
[00:46:52] I gained 70 pounds. I don't necessarily recommend it because it's really hard to get it off afterwards but it happens. Yeah, I'm still [00:47:00] trying and I child's 13 so it happens, you know. So let's talk about just those like moments like right after birth like so because it was natural. Did you get a chance to like hold him right away and nurse right away.
[00:47:13] Like how did that go? Oh, yeah. So exciting so did skin to skin contact right away and had him up on my my belly first and then Frank got to cut the cord to so that was really cool and they waited for the cord to like pulse out everything and he was just. Unitas I couldn't believe he came out of me and this little love and the like love in your heart for this.
[00:47:41] This human being like how did a human being come out of the inside of me? And how can I love this human being like more than life itself? And it was just overwhelming but I just kept looking at Frank and then looking at Alessandro and like oh my gosh, look what we did like look look at we look what our love did like.
[00:48:00] [00:48:00] That is just insane to me that like you can love what someone so much that you can create a life from your love. I mean, it's pretty a pretty profound experience. Yep nurse right away apgar score was good. I don't remember what it was. But yeah, it was he was a great little healthy little thing and and a beautiful birth.
[00:48:21] Yes. Awesome. So one of the things I like to ask the moms is like did you have a favorite? Product that you used when you are pregnant or after a pregnant or like when that you registered for that you got but do you have a favorite baby product? I would not say any particular baby product. But the store target has always been my Saving Grace and ladies listening out there who are pregnant or about to give birth or have given birth.
[00:48:52] They open at 8 a.m. That is key. Most places are not open at 8:00 a.m. And I'm talking like every day. They're open at 8:00 a.m. [00:49:00] So. I just would have to get out of the house. So I would bring the baby with me and it was a place to go and I'd get like some Starbucks and be walking around with my chai tea and my baby and it gave me a place indoors that was safe.
[00:49:15] Didn't matter what the weather was to just walk around and look at things and figure out what products I needed. Because let me tell you I needed stuff all the time. So at Target, I'm like, oh it's pretty in here. It's clean. Oh, here's some clothes for the baby. Here's some cream that I need from my nipples look like like like everybody they have it all like everything you need and this calm because no one's there at eight again.
[00:49:42] So it's a really easy place, you know, and. To go in the morning. So that is Sam's favorite baby product was all of Target all in service of targeted Starbucks. I'm telling you they saved my life. I don't do you still go to Target? And yes, I still on Saturday and Sunday. [00:50:00] It's just my routine. I like go.
[00:50:01] I go walk in the woods for like an hour and then I go to Target and the morning to see what I need and I have my Starbucks. Yep. It's my routine. Awesome. Okay, so then you have a 13 year old and a 12 year old. Yes, so I know you're in a. Very differently, you know stage of Life at this point. But if you have do you have any like profound mother advice to give to our listeners?
[00:50:23] So about their relationship with their partner about being a mom like, is there anything that you just want to share if there's any first-time moms listening? I think that I guess the best piece of advice I could get I give as listen to yourself listen to your own body, but like really open up to listening to what you need for yourself.
[00:50:49] Like if you're like, I need to eat a whole can of corn right now go for it and listen to your body. Listen to yourself because your body. Well tell [00:51:00] you what, it needs your baby will tell you what it needs rest when you need to rest. I mean, I can't tell you how many times I had a suit on come home from work with my shoes and my suit and I was like my baby wants to go to sleep right now and face first I would just fall on the bed shoes on suit still on and fall asleep and two hours later wake up.
[00:51:20] So do it if that's what your body is asking for do it. That would me by my biggest piece of advice. Yay. Well for anyone listening. That like love Sam and wants to hear about her second birth. We're going to have a part two where she talks about her. Birth. We're Heidi was my Doula where I was there do like yay, and she had an all natural childbirth with Peyton.
[00:51:42] So look for that episode, and I will put it in this episode's notes. So thanks everybody for listening. Thanks again for being on and telling us your story your awesome. I love you. Love you, too.